Exciting Movement

2022 has made me feel stuck in so many ways. Never did I realize the growth that I would find that would nourish my soul.

I completed a passion project with a friend and it came to life at the end of 2021. I saw highs and lows of this project early in 2022. This week marks over 120 copies of Addy’s Journey to her Forever Home sold! Reviews we have gotten from people has been incredible.

I got a Hysterectomy and was at least 20 lbs heavier than I’ve ever been before. The pain and the exhaustion were unbearable. The surgery went well but right when I started feeling better, I broke my foot.

I continued to gain weight and eat my feelings. I was in a boot for 13 months until I got a second opinion. I wallowed a little more.

August I began a new journey. A journey of healthy living. I began becoming mindful about what was fueling my body. Weight Watchers was a step in this direction, along with my own therapy, and the support of my friends and family.

I thank everyone that has helped during this difficult year. I’m grateful that I finally am able to see benefits to this year. I am more confident and sure of myself. I am more patient than I’ve been in a long time. I am providing self care like I never have before. I will work to ensure this growth continues.


Connecting and Love

It was one of those weeks that was chaotic, hard, and unfair. However, these experiences have allowed me to deeply connect more with my children and nurture the love in our family. Sometimes the world has a way of making us slow down so we don’t miss what is truly important.

Plans for today while kiddos work on getting better: Watch cartoons. Create Art. Read Books. Yoga (if up for it). Chalk (outside on this beautiful Sunday). Scrumptious food. Love. Halloween spooky movie.

Thought for today: hold your kids tight and listen to them intently. Love unconditionally. Parenting is a balancing act, but if you do it with love and compassion for yourself and them they will succeed.


The hospital call…

It was break during our staff meeting at work yesterday. My heart dropped. The nurse at my son’s school called as well as my husband. I missed these calls and only had bits of information from the short voicemails left. I called my dad and found out my son had a petit mal seizure at school, also known as an absence seizure.

Luckily my work is amazing and I was able to leave, no questions asked, other than “are you okay to drive to him?” I stated “yes” in a definitive tone. Of course on the way to the hospital a traffic jam ensued but I made it there as fast as I could. Liam was tired but overall seemed in good spirits and was the most patient kid in the room.

Seeing my husband made me remember, don’t take on guilt for not seeing my son’s school calling during a meeting. My husband and I are a team and he made it. Hewas able to leave for work after a few hours and we are both here to support one another. I am grateful for this.

The hospital was overrun with patients. The wait was long, but the workers were doing the best they could. I can’t say enough fantastic things about our doctor. He was very thorough and knew specifically what to ask. He didn’t just listen to the resident who didn’t ask the right questions and stated my son may have been out of it for attention. Liam is the type of kid who’s body would never left him fake being still. He’s a kid on the go. The doctor worked hard to ensure we felt comfortable with his diagnosis and answered all the questions we had.

The good news, I have an exceptional kid who is learning compassion through patience and communication. His type of seizure isn’t permanently damaging. I am fortunate and lucky for everyone that texted and called to check on Liam. Today we rest which is something we didn’t plan, but all desperately need. Our bodies have a way of telling us this. Sending positive thoughts of good health to all.


Aha Moment To Connect with the Present

I took my daughter to our local dollar store this weekend. The clerk checking us out was an amazing woman. She was beyond kind to my daughter and began our day with solace that there are so many wonderful people in our world.

This clerk and I were making small talk. I joked about Lucy being a handful and she reminded me, little kids little problems, big kids big problems. This woman raised 3 young adults that are in the scary phase of learning how to be responsible adults that will sustain them. We further connected and offered each other praise and strength mother to mother.

Continuing to ponder on the idea of little kids little problems, I find myself realizing how these problems now really are chance a for me to instill in my children resiliency, love, communication and advocacy. Once they are adults they will need these skills engrained in them.

My hope is the way I’m helping them navigate these little problems with flourish in themselves bright and amazing futures. Futures filled with compassion for others and themselves. Futures where they are resilient and motivated to live their best lives. Futures where they are not ashamed or embarrassed to stand up for what’s right. They got this!


What I Have Control Over

I have made strides on my healing journey over the last 2 weeks. After a hysterectomy earlier this year, breaking my foot 3 months later, and being in a boot for 13 weeks, I decided it was time I found something to feel in control of.

I made the decision to switch doctors. The doctor I saw told me to get out of the boot and into a shoe. His recommendation was if it stays the same or gets better it’s healing. If it’s worse come back to him. I can proudly say I don’t think I have to see him again!

I started physical therapy and I am becoming stronger each day. Everyday I wake up and make the choice to do the exercises. I am hopeful that my foot is healing, finally!

With the cards I was dealt I made the choice not to judge myself due to not being able to go for walks or be as active as I was prior to surgery. I wallowed. I think I needed this time of wallowing to help me get in the headspace of being ready to make some big changes.

I began Weight Watchers 2 weeks ago and lost 5 1/2 lbs. Weight Watchers has allowed me to be mindful about what I am putting in my body. I am looking at food as a way to fuel my body. Previously I looked at food as a way to join me in loathing my body. I am hopeful that I will love my body for the vessel it is. I am beginning to.

Throughout this journey I have been to an amazing therapist that has helped me process and understand the root of my anxieties and the loss of control. I am excited for the last part of 2022 and have plans for 2023 to be my year. I will keep you all updated!


Overcoming Fears

My son started a new season of soccer and we were unsure what the second practice would look like. His first practice my dad took him and he left after 15 minutes. Fear set in.

I asked him to try it again, and this time I would take him. If he did well, even if he wanted to sit there he would get a reward. I’m not above bribing if it means helping my kid overcome his fear and be able to enjoy something active.

He agreed to come. At first he stood back and was mad at me for walking to the field, because he didn’t want to leave my side and this made him come to the field to. I then joined in and he followed suit. Within 10 minutes I was able to go sit with the other parents! Afterwards, he said, “That was a blast!”

Such a simple example of a child overcoming his fear with support and love surrounding him. I could have let him give up and shut down, and I debated about this. I’m glad I did what I did, knowing how he loved soccer the prior season. I’m so proud of Liam for overcoming his fear and putting his all into the practice!

Always remember to encourage your kids. Remember there’s a fine line between encouraging and forcing. They don’t have to be perfect, they just have to try.


The Foundation Matters

My husband and I had a wonderful dinner out for our anniversary. I always remind myself how important it is to make family time special. I often forget the importance of nurturing the relationship that began our family.

9 years and 2 kids later we were beginning to forget the foundation. Last night we got to laugh without hesitation, enjoy adult conversation that had nothing to do with our kids, and be intimate in a way we don’t have time or patience for. It was wonderful and I know We are lucky.

Our foundation consists of uplifting one another’s hope and dreams. Smiling at the life we are building. Laughing at inside jokes that only silas and I get. Trusting one another with our hearts. Knowing that love and quality time matter, not the gifts or the material gestures.

I hope to instill these values in our children. I know making time for one another will instill healthy relationships and connections in our children. Our cups are half full again.

Make time for those that are important to you. Refill your cups. Spend quality time to invigorate your soul.


Parenting a Toddler Is…

Parenting a toddler is equal parts challenging and amazing. Every day is filled with wonder, tears, smiles, hugs, discipline, and crumbs. So many …

Parenting a Toddler Is…

At a stand still trying to see the light

My foot has been in a boot for 2 1/2 months. I went to the doctor last week with hopes that it was progressing. I was met with, it’s still barely healing and you’re doing all the right things.

I asked if surgery previously would have made a difference. “It may have, but…” my doctor wants put me on a bone stimulating machine to help my foot heal. I’ve read articles that say 86% success rate and other articles that say 38%. I’m working on a second opinion as we can be our best advocates.

My kids keep asking me when it will be healed. My response is “I don’t know. Hopefully soon!” It’s so hard being a good mom when we have things going on outside of our control. The best we can do is be honest, loving, supportive and provide hope to our children.

I know one day I will be healed and this will be a distant memory. My dads girlfriend reminded me how these experiences have grown my children’s ability to empathize. I am working on accepting my body as is and focus on the positives that happen. Each night I plan to provide myself with 3 gratifying statements that are positive towards my body and mind.

Sending positive thoughts to those that can understand these frustrations. Encouraging you to find hope and love for your inner selves.


Fourth of July

Watching fireworks last night, I felt a sense of peace and contentment overcome my sense of being. I snuggled my little boy and held my daughters hand that was nestled with her dad.

I began to think of all the other families stories that surrounded us. What did it take for them and their ancestors to get here? What are the hardships and peace that they know? I wish them all to feel the love that I had in my heart at that moment and have within me often.

I am thankful for the freedoms we have, thanks to all those that have served and continue to serve. I hope the future brings back freedoms that have been taken from us. I hope my daughter and other young ladies have the same choices my generation had growing up. Enjoy your family and snuggle them tight this Fourth of July.